Feb 13, 2011

Dear Benjamin,

Last night, while rocking you to sleep in your nursery, I broke down in tears thinking of all the children in this world who will never know the safe, warm and loving home that you have. All children deserve to be loved, and I feel so incredibly helpless to know that many of them are being mistreated and I can't stop it. Some day I'm going to have to warn you about people who hurt children, and teach you not to talk to strangers. But not yet. Right now things are just so simple and perfect. Your needs are so basic and I can provide them all. Your father is a little jealous of me because at this stage of your life, you need me the most. That will change very soon, but for now I'm loving it.

My protective mothering instincts have really shocked me, by the way. I have gone from being a virtual pacifist to feeling like I could rip someone's head off if they even tried to hurt you. It's pretty incredible, but maybe in some crazy way my mind believes if I protect you a whole bunch, it's like I'm protecting those other children as well. How am I ever going to teach you how to be a man when I don't even want to let you leave the house without me? I guess I have some time to figure that out.

All my love,
Mom